Help Me Breathe
by TheInflictedFinger
Summary: NaruSasu NarutoSasuke NaruGaa NarutoGaara yaoi.Naruto's tired of everything bad happening to him.Those around him are always receiving, when all he seems to be doing is giving.
1. Alone I Break

**Chapter 1**

**Alone I Break**

"Sometimes it takes losing what you hate, to realize you loved it all along."

Naruto woke up and stretched his arms tiredly, letting them fall to lay across warm flesh.The blonde blinked rapidly and sat up, face softening into a smile as he gazed at his lover.

"Sasuke..."He shook the other boy's shoulder.

"Nnnn..Go away dobe.."

Sweatdropping, Naruto got up and slid on his too-big longsleeved black shirt with a red spiral on the back and then slipped on his baggy black pants."Fine, if you're late, don't snap at me when I get home tonight."

"Nnn.."

The blonde walked into the kitchen, got a sip of water, then jogged to the door and slid on his ankle socks and heavy black hiking boots."BYE Sasuke!"

"What?!What time is it?!"

Naruto snickered quietly and slipped out the door, stuffing his tanned hands into his pockets and slouching.At the age of 16, Naruto had grown, yet was still two or three inches shorter than Sasuke.All the cute roundness he carried on his face as a child was gone and now he was slim and lithe, muscles rippling beneath the surface of tanned skin.

Sasuke had let his hair grow out a little longer, and was still the heartthrob of Konoha.Last year during a mission, Sasuke had confessed to the blonde, hesitant and gruff.But Naruto got the point, and returned it full force.After that they were inseperable, though people thought they were only friends.

Naruto turned the corner and paused when he saw Sakura."Hey!!"

Sakura blinked and turned away from Ino, smiling when she saw Naruto.The pink haired girl had warmed up to Naruto, not in a way as any more than friends, but all the same, Naruto was content with the relationship they had.

"Good morning Sakura-chan."He greeted, flashing his trademark grin.

"Where's Sasuke?"Ino asked, glancing around with hungry eyes.

The other blonde's eye twitched ever so slightly but he shrugged,"He's still asleep."

"Eh?!He'll be late!We have to go!"

"What?We?"

Sakura pouted,"Ino and him have a mission together.It's not fair..Sasuke kun is mine..Ino pig."

"Big forehead!It'll be like our honey moon."The blonde girl was starry-eyed and drooling.

Naruto snorted in disgust, tuning Ino's rants out as he seethed.-Why didn't Sasuke tell me?Was he afraid I'd be mad?Or maybe..he likes Ino..-The Kyuubi inside him growled lowly, and for once Naruto had to agree with him.

"Hm, Sasuke didn't tell me about that."He blinked.

Ino scowled,"Just because he's your 'friend' doesn't mean you have to know everything about him.I'm surprised he even talks to you, you're such a slob."

"Ino.."Sakura sighed.

"What?He is!"

Naruto flashed them another smile, though now strained as he turned away and waved over his shoulder,"Tell Sasuke I said bye."

"Yeah ri-"Sakura slapped a hand over Ino's mouth."We will Naruto."

When out of earshot, Naruto started cussing and people shied from him in alarm.Not that the Kyubi holder cared, they also went out of their way to keep a good distance away from him.

"Fucking bastard!Doesn't tell me anything!He doesn't care!And now he's going with that fucking bitch on a mission..."He slumped and sighed."Why do I have the feeling that he's forgotten me?"

Naruto turned the corner and walked into the ramen stand."I'm here old man."

"And on time, amazing."The man replied, busily stirring a pot.

The blonde tied an apron around his waist and began frying chicken and rice.

"A bowl of pork ramen, please."

"Comin' up.."Naruto muttered, stepping past his employer to scoop ramen from the pot and into a glass bowl.He turned to the counter and nearly dropped the ramen."Kakashi!Iruka?!"

Iruka flushed and tried to scoot away from Kakashi.Kakashi smiled, not looking away from Naruto's face and slung an arm around Iruka's shoulder to keep him in place.

"We decided to go out and eat."

Naruto snickered, eyeing his adopted father Iruka,"A date?"

"Yep"

"NO ITS NOT!"Iruka cried.

"It's ok Iruka sama.Here, look, I'll give you one set of chopsticks so you guys can share."He smirked.

"Naruto--"Iruka growled.

"Thankyou Naruto."Kakashi smiled and shoved a chopstick-full of noodles in his boyfriend's mouth.

Turning back to the pot, he continued his plots of revenge on his lover.-No sex for a week!I won't cook for him!HE will be the one to clean the house!I--His eyes widened in horror."IM THE WOMAN!"He shouted aloud in his shock.

Kakashi choked and Iruka stared at him.Naruto hurriedly glanced over his shoulder at them and flashed a grin, waving his hand,"I was just joking.Just..joking..."He flushed and went back to chopping up vegetables.-Bastard!He never does anything!He doesn't even act..like he wants this relationship to work..-

He began chopping violently-Damnit!Why do I put up with him!I should go and confront him!-He nodded viciously in agreement with himself-And tell him JUST HOW MUCH OF A --He yelped as the knife came down on his finger.

He took deep breaths to calm himself and stared down at the blood pooling beneath his almost severed finger.-Just a couple minutes and it'll be healed.-

"Naruto, more ramen please?"Kakashi called sweetly.

"Uh..yeah..one second.."He touched the healed wound and then cleaned the blood up with a dish towel before sauntering over the pot and getting more ramen for his former senseis.

"Naruto."

The blonde jumped and looked towards the other corner of the stand, seeing a bored looking Uchiha sitting on a stool."I have to go away for a day.I'll be back sometime tomorrow."

Naruto hid his growl and tilted his head inquisitively,"Where ya goin'?"

Sasuke stood,"Like I said, be back tomorrow."

Naruto sighed and started to turn away, but a pale hand on his arm stopped him.Sasuke leaned forward and quickly kissed his cheek before wandering off down the road.The blonde blushed and then looked up, seeing Iruka and Kakashi staring in shock.

"Uh.....................Enjoy your ramen."Naruto coughed and quickly returned to the other counter, chopping.-Crap crap crap...He's never..kissed me in public before..-He smiled slightly and stopped, staring down at the cutting board and mutilated vegetable parts.-Maybe I'm just overreacting..-

"SASUKE-CHHAANN"Ino cheered as they paraded past the ramen stand, the blonde girl latched onto Sasuke's arm and yanking him towards Konoha's gates.

Naruto glared icily and met Sasuke's eyes.The dark haired boy's eyes swam with emotion and he actually looked concerned, but Ino dragged him away.

-Bastard Bastard BASTARD!-Naruto fumed.

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The stoic blonde wandered the streets aimlessly, homocidal thoughts drifting through his head.-Haha, They can go in a coffin together, since they love eachother so much!-

"Watch where you're going, demon."A burly villager growled, slamming his shoulder into Naruto's before continuing on his way.

Naruto sighed in the growing darkness and leaned against a building wall."He always is wanted.No matter where he goes.Either for his looks, skills, heritage, or brains.And no matter where I go, Im unwanted.We're complete opposites!"He threw his hands up,"whoever said opposites attract maybe was right, but love?!An actual RELATIONSHIP??What about THAT?Does he just want me for the sex??"

The odds seemed in favour of that revalation."How pathetic can I get...Im fucking my rival...Working at a ramen stand when Im susposed to be out on missions DOING something..And everyone still hates me.What life do I have here in Konoha?"

"If you don't have a life, fox demon, git outta here!"A filthy bum crowed from his pile of rags.

Naruto sweatdropped and eyed him,"Yeah?Where would I go?"

The man muttered incoherantly, scratched his filthy head, and promptly continued snoring.

"Right...."The blonde ninja continued his wandering with a sigh.He fumbled in the large pocket of his pants and pulled out his portable cd player.Slipping on the headphones, he quickly glanced around then pushed play, bobbing his sun kissed head to the angry growling of Korn.

'All the shit I seem to take, all alone I seem to break.I have done the best I can, does this make me not a man?'

He sang softly to the lyrics and hunched his shoulders, staring down at the ground that he could only see with the help of the Kyubi inside of him, who's eyes could see in the dark.-I don't know what to do...-

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Naruto slid the keys into the lock and twisted them sharply to the left, opening the door and jerking the keys free with a sigh as the door clicked shut behind him.

He slipped off his black hiking boots then stared ahead at the darkness and silence of his apartment."Why does this seem so familiar?.."He muttered sarcastically and padded into the kitchen.

Opening the fridge, Naruto winced slightly at the bright light that alluminated the darkened house.His dark blue eyes scanned the fridge for any leftovers, because he knew there was no ramen left.

"Nothing..right..I wasn't hungry anyways."He slammed the fridge shut and shuffled into the bedroom.

The sheets were still ruffled and wrinkled from the previous night.Sasuke never did bother to make the bed, or eat before leaving.It just seemed like a daily routine, receiving missions from the Hokage, completing them, coming to Naruto apartment.A round of sex(or two), sleeping or leaving, then waking up in the morning for some more sex.

"That's our relationship.."Naruto muttered, not bothering to remove his clothes as he slid beneath the cool sheets.He pulled his sweatshirt sleeves over his fingertips, shivering a little at the tempature of the apartment, and closed his eyes.

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The blonde jerked awake to the sound of footsteps.Naruto narrowed his eyes and reached beneath his pillow, hand gripping the handle of his kunai.-Who the hell?..-

He glanced at the clock and blinked in shock.-6:00 AM?!-Naruto stood and crept to his bedroom door, pushing it open and slipping into the hall.

"S-sasuke?!"

Sasuke blinked blearily and sway a little, squinting at Naruto,"Wha-...whattcha doin' in my house?"

"Wha?.."Naruto took a step back when he saw Ino stumble into Sasuke, shutting the door behind herself.She giggled and placed a sloppy kiss on his cheek.

"Sasssukkee..where's za bedroooooom?"She stumbled slightly then raised her head, glaring at Naruto."Whazze doin' here sasuke?"

"This is my house.What the fuck are you doing here?What did you do to Sasuke??"Naruto demanded, blue eyes tinted with red.

"We hadda few drinks.W-..we're gunna finally get married, right 'suke?"

Sasuke seemed very dazed as he put a hand to his head and leaned against the kitchen counter.

Naruto squeezed his eyes shut, trying to hold back tears."Get out."

"You can't kick 's out!'s 'suke's house!"Ino screamed, leaning farther into Sasuke.

"GET.OUT."Naruto bared his fangs and took a step forward, a reddish orange chakra clawing at the air surrounding him.

"Monster!"Ino screamed.

"N-..naruto?"Sasuke rubbed his forehead."What am I..why does my head hurt so damned much?"

"IM GOING TO KILL YOU!"Naruto growled and leapt forward.

Ino cried hysterically and fumbled with the doorknob, finally getting it open.She ran out, leaving Sasuke behind to face the blonde nin's wrath.

Naruto's claw dug into Sasuke's skin as he pinned him against the wall.

"What the hells wrong with you?!"He screamed at Sasuke, tears running from his red eyes."I gave you everything!I loved you!Y-you..."He released Sasuke with one hand to punch the wall.

"Naruto I-"Sasuke eyes were wide.

"GET OUT!Don't come near me again!I hate you!"Naruto lifted Sasuke and threw him out the door.He didn't bother to grab the knob but instead raked his claws across the door, slamming it.

The blonde hugged himself desperately, claws drawing blood from his shoulders as he slid down the door to the floor."Why..why me..why does everything happen to me.."

The fox inside him was making strange keening sounds, and Naruto realized there was a great pain in his chest..right where his heart was..His now normal fingers touched his chest and he gave a dry sob."I loved him.."

Someone pounded on the door behind him and Naruto abruptly stopped sobbing, stopped breathing, and waited.

"N-naruto...Please..let me in.."Sasuke shouted into the door.

"Go away..just go away.."Naruto pressed his forehead into his knees and tried to contain the Kyubi's chakra as it flared with renewed anger.

"NARUTO!"

The blonde ignored Sasuke's voice and smiled as his eyes drifted shut, hoping for death, and realized with regret that it was just all the exhaustion and pain finally coming to take him away.Then darkness consumed his mind.

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Sasuke stood outside, staring at the door to his lover's apartment.-Gods, what have I done?..-

"Naruto!Naruto!!"He leaned against the door, knocking furiously.

There was no reply.No whiskered grin and bear hug.No Naruto opening the door with a shout and love in his deep blue eyes.Just..nothing..

"Naruto..please.."Sasuke fell to his knees, palms and forehead pressed against the door as if he could push it open."I love you too..."Tears ran down his cheeks to hit the doorstop.

And then something else began to mingle with the tears on his face.The raven haired nin looked up in amazement, holding out his hands.Snow drifted down to melt on his pale flesh.

He closed his fist and brought it to his forehead, body wracked with sobs.It seemed as though the heavens cried with him.-I should have told him..why did I push him away?Please Naruto..please forgive me..-

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First Chapter is done..thankgod..took me a while;

Yesyes, Im sorry to those Naruto/Sasuke lovers.I already have an idea with what I'll continue the story..and it probably won't be Naruto/Sasuke.


	2. Goodbye To You

**Chapter 2**

**Goodbye To You**

**"Sometimes its easier to just run away and leave all the pain behind."**

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Naruto stepped out of his apartment and then turned to lock it.He sighed and turned and clenched his teeth to keep from yelling at Sasuke who leaned against the wall beside his door.

He had already tried that before..

Flashback

The blonde stepped away from his door and turned towards the direction of his work.Then startled slightly when he noticed Sasuke standing next to the door.He stared into the soulful dark pools that seemed to plead with Naruto to forgive him.

"What the fuck are you doing outside of my door, stalking me?"Naruto asked coldly, narrowing his eyes.

Sasuke opened his mouth, then closed it, his expression filled with inner conflict and pain."Naruto..Im s-"

"Well well, you remember my name.Im surprised, there must be so many names to remember since you sleep with so many people."Naruto smirked and started down the road, intending to leave his former lover behind.

Sasuke followed closely behind,"Naruto..im sorry..please-"

"Sasuke."The Kyubi holder stopped, not turning around."Don't apologise.I don't want your pity.I understand, you don't love me the way I loved you.Its just over, I want you to leave me alone, I want you to stay.the.fuck.away.from.me.Don't follow me, don't wait for me.Don't even WAVE to me.Just go away."Naruto continued on.

The other man clenched his jaw and fists, stopping and staring at his back."I won't give up.."He whispered.

End Flashback

Naruto settled for ignoring Sasuke, who had kept up this little game the entire week.His heart was already shattered and didn't need more damage.What was the point?Everytime he made a friend or got into a relationship, it was destroyed.

"Hey Konomaharu."He waved to the boy.

"Naruto!!"The Kono glomped him and clang.

"Hehe..Where are you off to?"Naruto asked affectionately, petting the boy's head.

"Im susposed to meet my team, we've got a mission today."

"That's awesome!Well, you'd better hurry up if you don't want to be late."Naruto commented.

Konomaharu nodded, releasing Naruto and stared behind at Sasuke."Hey Sasuke!"

"Hey.."

The boy looked from Sasuke to Naruto, a crease on his forehead, then ran off.Naruto watched him for a minute, a distant look in his eyes.

"What are you doing Sasuke?.."Naruto growled.

"Im waiting until you're ready to talk to me."Sasuke replied calmly.

"And what did I tell you?"Naruto questioned.

"....."

"Get lost."Naruto turned the corner, reaching the ramen stand.

"Hey Naruto..."The cook did a double take."Gods, you're here on time again.Im lucky this week, eh?"

Naruto smiled,"I guess so.Does that mean you want me to be late next time?"He asked innocently.

His employer gave him a mock stern look, shook his head, and went back to chopping carrots.

The blonde quickly looked over his shoulder as he was tying the aprong around his waist.-No Sasuke, good, he must have gone off to do something.-

Naruto went to making a pot of ramen.-This is the last day..I just need to write a quick note to the Hokage, get my paycheck, and I've packed what I need..so..right after work...-

"Hey, Ray?"

"Yeah kid?"Ray asked, looking up.

"Can I have my paycheck today?Im kinda going somewhere for awhile."Naruto replied.

Ray eyed him carefully, turning to lean against the counter.He crossed his arms over his chest,"For how long."

Naruto's shoulders slumped,"I don't know.."

"Kid..if you need anything..if someones doin' something to you.."Ray growled.Naruto was amazed that the man had even hired him.Even though he had aten there many times, Ray still knew he was the holder of the fox demon.But unlike other people, Ray didn't seem to give a damn what other people thought, and cared even less about the 'secret'.

"Nono,"the blonde smiled reassuringly."I just..need to get away for awhile."

"Alright.I'll give you yer pay check.But you come back..I'll be waiting and you'll have a job here."Ray said, meeting his eyes and holding them.

Naruto nodded quickly, hating the fact that he was lying to his friend."I know."

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Walking down the street, Naruto took in everything around him, the smells, the sounds, even the people that had hated him all his life.-I want to remember everything.So maybe..if I come back here someday, I'll be changed...and they'll accept me.And I'll finally be able to call Konoha home.-

"Naruto."A deep voice hissed from behind him.

"Wha..?"The blonde turned and rolled his eyes when he saw Sasuke.He yipped in surprise when the dark haired nin grabbed his arm."Let go!"

Sasuke ignored him and stare at his fingers.

"What?!"Naruto looked down, mouth gaping when he spotted the blood dripping from his finger.-But that healed..last week...how..-

"What happened?!You idiot!How could you not notice your finger was nearly severed?!"Sasuke shouted while hurriedly unwrapped some of the bandages he always kept around his arm and wrapped Naruto's finger tightly."Come on, we have to have that sewed."

Naruto hissed and jerked his arm away, glaring,"Baka.I don't need to go to the hospital.Just leave me alone."-He doesn't know about the Kyubi..he can't know.It'll heal soon enough.-

"Naruto."Sasuke growled, leaning in very close."I've been tolerant of you ignoring me, shouting insults at me, maybe even hating me.Just please, please do this for me.You could bleed to death.."Sasuke stepped forward hesitantly, then quickly gathered him into a hug.

The other man flushed and considered struggling, but gave in to the familiar scent and warmth.-What?..what's happening?-

Sasuke's grip tightened when he realized Naruto wasn't pulling away.

"J-jeez..its just..my finger.."Naruto stuttered, snapping his mouth shut to keep from groaning.His hands tightened on Sasuke's sleeves.

"Naruto?I-I've..really missed you."Sasuke whispered, swallowing to restrain his emotions.

"NO!"Naruto pushed him away, hugging himself.

"Naruto.."

"Sasuke.I said stay away."The blonde ran down the street, ignoring the glares and insults that were yelled at him as he ducked through the crowd.He practically dove into his house and bolted the door behind him.

"Kyubi, what are you doing to me.."Naruto panted.

'IM not doing anything.It looks like you've finally grown up.'

"What?"

'Your hormones..'

"Perverted fox!Shutup and tell me WHATS HAPPENING!"Naruto ground out.

'Like I said.Your hormones.You're in heat.'Kyubi purred.

"......................fuck....h-how?.."

'Im female.While in heat, both of our chakras become unstable and behave differently.Your finger, for example.I can't heal it.The chakra merely holds the wound together, causing the illusion that its healed, and then is released when the wound is finally healed naturally, like a seal.'

"I CANT BE IN HEAT!IM A GUY!"

'And Im not..'She replied calmly.

"But I have to leave..when do I..er....stop..being in heat?"Naruto sweatdropped.

'A couple days.'Kyubi snickered.

"...................................if im away from people it doesn't really work right?"

'Work?When you're in heat, you're in heat.You can't just turn it off!'

"Well,..it doesn't matter anyways.Im leaving."Naruto leaned forward and pressed his forhead to the cool glass of the window, watching the snow drifting down."Bye..Sasuke.."The blonde turned from the window with an air of finality and strode to his room to sling the pack with all his essentials over his shoulder.

With that Naruto jerked open the door and stepped outside, blinking at the blizzard-like weather, and smiled.-No one will see me leave.Perfect.-He felt a pang of guilt, then shook it off."Iruka doesn't care.He doesn't even see me anymore.Sakuras avoiding me with that bitch Ino..and Sasuke..I can't forgive him.."

-Just you and me, baka fox.-

'Oh joy.'She muttered dryly.

Pulling his black zip-up hoody closer, the blonde hunched his shoulders and stare down at the snow and baggy black pants that covered his shoes.Blindly he made his way towards Konoha's gates and upon reaching them, he began making a seal to make himself seem invisible, then let his hands drop when he realized his chakra was still 'out of order'.

So instead Naruto reached down his pants, looking around to make sure no one was watching, and pulled two kunai from the bandage wrapped around his bare thigh.(Perverts.All of you.-shakes head then snickers with shifty eyes-)Naruto balanced the handles of the nin weapons in his palms.-Its been so long since I've held these.Time to put them to use-

He dug them into the wood of Konoha's gates and grit his teeth, hauling himself up with them.He dug his hiking boots into the grooves of wood, then quickly stuck the kunai further up into the gate with a 'shunk!'.Naruto repeated this process until he reached the top of the gates.He glanced to either side, narrowing his eyes at the small forts constructed along the wall to shelter the ninjas on guard.He saw no movement and decided they hadn't spotted him.The blonde leaped from the top of the gate and bit back a yell as his stomach swam.

Blindly he tried stabbed at the gates, trying to get some hold on the wood with his kunai.Finally, the knife-like weapons stuck and held, sliding downward at a slower pace until Naruto landed in the deepening snow.

"Gods, what a brilliant idea, Naruto.Wear all black clothes when its snowing.We'll blend right in!"He muttered to himself as he glanced over his shoulder at the gates before crouching and slinking into the relative safety of the forest.

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Im sorry, this chapter is shorter than the rest.but im not basing the chapter size on the number of paragraphs, Im basing it on events.--; So the next chapter will be on Naruto in the woods, and maybe..-shifty eyes- running into someone.

Since I've lost the internet, I decided to write a story while i was dying of boredom.So don't worry, these stories aren't going to crash and burn like the other ones.I haven't updated those yet because I kinda..lost the enthusiasm for continuing those.But don't freak, they will be updated, and im truly sorry for the delay.


	3. Falling Out Of Reach

**Chapter 3**

**Falling Out Of Reach**

**"We always hurt the ones we love."**

The shadowed figure hovered above him, then slowly descended.Naruto welcomed him with open arms and pulled him down to lay on top of him.

"Naruto..."The shadow purred and slid slim cool fingers down the tanned skin of the blonde nin's sides.

"Ah..."Naruto groaned as the fingers wrapped around his erection and slowly slid up and down, torturing him with their pace.

"My Naruto.."The fingers coaxed more precum out of him before one of the hands released their hold and pinched his nipple.

The blonde arched under the touch, thrashing mindlessly,"Please.."

"Naruto.."The figure panted and wrapped his arms around him, nuzzling his neck as his mate came."I love you.."

The Kyubi holder opened his mouth to scream his lover's name.

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Naruto sat up with a start and blinked blearily at the squirrel in his lap.

'Quite an interesting dream..'.Kyubi smirked.

-Perverted fox.-Naruto grumbled and stood shakily, grimacing down at the stain on the front of his pants."I've had wet dreams, but this is getting ridiculous.I thought you said it only lasted for a couple days."The squirrel eyed him curiously, before chittering in alarm and climbing a tree.

'A couple days...a couple weeks....all the same.'

The blonde growled,"You said a couple DAYS.Now its weeks?!"

'It was a couple weeks in the first place but I didn't want to have to put up with your screaming!'Kyubi snarled.

Naruto quieted for a second,"Kyubi...can you tell who I'm dreaming about?"

The fox demon inside of him rumbled,'No, but I wish I could, so we can finally end this.'

-Eh?-

'Baka ningen...You have to find your mate.Otherwise we're going to have to live with insomnia forever.I swear, every night..the same dream.'

-You never said that either!!!-

'Great..now I have a headache..and THAT is why I didn't TELL you.Annoying screeching human child..we're close to him, anyways..'Kyubi groaned mentally and put a mental wall up.

"Fine, stupid fox.Hide.AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE'RE CLOSE TO-"A flock of birds taking off quieted him. Naruto watched as they flew in blind terror in the opposite direction. He turned, eyes scanning into the depths of the woods for any sign of danger.

-Kyubi!Wake up!-

There was no reply from the sleeping fox."Damnit, why is everyone always gone when I need them the most?"

The blonde gripped his kunai handle firmly in his fist and crept behind a tree trunk, pressing his back flat against it as he held his breath, waiting.

A hand gripping his blonde hair and yanking his head back, drew a yelp from the alarmed Naruto. Naruto opened his mouth to swear, but a kunai pressed against his neck silenced him.

He raised his midnight blue eyes to stare into emerald green.

"Gaara?"

Gaara's eyes widened, an unreadable emotion flashing in his eyes before the usual emotionless mask slid back on."What are you doing here, Naruto?"He didn't release his hold on the other boy.

"What are YOU doing here??"

Gaara eyed him strangely,"I'm on a mission to retrieve a missing nin."

Naruto tilted his head, wincing when he remembered the blade pressed to his flesh,"This far from Sand Country?"

"Baka, we're not that far from Sand Country at all.How did you get all the way over here?"Gaara questioned, narrowing his eyes.

"I walked."

Shakaku's holder snorted and released his hair abruptly, flipping from the tree and landing on his feet."Right, why then?"

Naruto's eyes flickered with pain, but he held Gaara's eyes,"Its none of your business."

The Sand nin smirked, but it had a hurt look to it,"Go home, Konoha scum."

"Hey, who has the demon inside them here?!"Naruto cried, remembering that Gaara didn't know about Kyubi.

Gaara took a step back, glaring fiercely."Go home before I slit your throat."

The blonde recognized the pain in Gaara's eyes and sighed,"Gaara I-"A wave of heat washed over him.

Kyubi keened in his mind, mindlessly thrashing.

He fell to his knees, then on his stomach, panting.He was burning up, the fire inside was consuming him.

"Naruto!"Gaara knelt beside him."Baka, get up!"

The blonde allowed to welcomed darkness to swallow his mind.

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"Uhn...."Midnight blue eyes blinked open to stare at a parchment white ceiling."Hn.."He turned his head, squinting.

Emerald green eyes filled his vision.

"AH!"Naruto clawed his way to the other side of the bed, chest heaving."Where am I?!"

"Sand Country."Gaara stated, breaking eye contact and walking over to the other side of the room to lift a pitcher of water.He carefully poured it into a cup as Naruto watched suspiciously.

"And why am I in Sand Country, oh great panda?"

The other boy gave him a warning look, but walked back to the bed to hold out the cup,"Drink."He ordered.

The blonde stare at the cup a minute, then looked back into Gaara's eyes.

Emerald eyes narrowed,"I didn't poison it."

"How can I be sure?..."Naruto questioned slowly, raising an eyebrow.

Gaara blinked at him in confusion,"Look idiot, I didnt-"

"I know I know.Sheesh, can't take a joke."Naruto snatched away the cup and drank it in one swallow.

Gaara stared at him in barely concealed amazement before clenching his teeth."Why did you drink it?"

Naruto gaped at him in startlement,"You mean you did poison it?"

"No, but..."The other boy eyed him with a questioning look and sighed,"nevermind.."

Naruto clung to his arm with wide puppy eyes,"Where did you put my clothes?"he asked, realizing that he was only in his baggy black pants.

Gaara flushed and looked away,"They're being cleaned."

"Ah.Ok, I'll just wait here."Naruto lay back on the bed, splaying his arms and staring at the ceiling.

"Naruto..."Gaara started.

"Huh?"Blue eyes snapped from the ceiling to focus their attention on Shakaku's holder.

"Are you...a demon??"

"....w-why do you ask that?.."Naruto flushed.

"Your smell...Its driving Shakaku.."Gaara closed his eyes and swallowed,"and me crazy..I don't know what it is..but..im assuming its.."

Naruto clenched his teeth,"Gaara.."

"Why didn't you tell me Naruto?"The other boy hissed."You insulted me, and all along you were just the same.EXACTLY the same."

"Im not the same as you,"The blonde snarled in reply,"I don't kill people for the joy of it, I don't for fight my own selfish intentions.Im NOT like you."

Gaara smirked,"you think I was born the way I was?"

"Do you think I was??"

Gaara blinked at him, then quickly looked away with a strained expression,"We ARE the same though.We've both killed.And don't tell me in your seventeen years of pathetic life that you haven't killed anyone!"

"Stop Gaara.I've had enough of you and your deranged sense of right and wrong.Im fucking out of here."Naruto stood and pushed Gaara away from him, glaring as he made his way to the door.

Just as he was about to turn the knob, strong tanned arms wrapped around him from behind, a chin on the top of his head."Naruto...I just want you to like me.."He squeezed his green eyes shut to hold back the tears."Everyone that said they loved me lied.We're the SAME-"

Naruto's mouth opened to cut him off but Gaara nuzzled his hair, causing him to shiver.

"Now that I've found someone like me..a monster..Im not alone..i don't want to ever lose this feeling, Naruto."Gaara sighed, the mesh material of his shirt touching Naruto's bare back,"I know you left because someone lied to you.I don't know..why anyone would ever hurt you..you're so beautiful...so bright..that's why I.."Gaara bit his bottom lip and tightened his hold.

"Gaara."Naruto said."Im not beautiful...never say Im beautiful.."

Gaara growled in the back of his throat,"yes you are, baka."

A moment of silence passed between them.

"Do you...you really think Im beautiful?"Naruto's words were forced and choked.

Gaara smiled against the nape of his neck,"Yes."

The blonde's shoulders shook in a silent sob and the other boy held him, neither of them noticing as their chakra reached out and twined together, splitting and melding as both of the jaded souls found eachother's lips.

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Ok...kinda cheesy....Ok..REALLY cheesy.;And this is an angst fix..so believe me..there will be more angst.But for right now, Im lookin' for reviews.Please please please review!

Im EXTREMELY sorry for those who are probably thinking 'what the hell?'

I removed this chapter during one of my classes because one of my male friends found out about it and logged on to read my story and chapter three has heavy yaoi and I didn't want him to KNOW I was a pervert..so I removed it...I edited one of the sentences that I didn't quite word right, anyways..sorry..


	4. Been Bleeding Too Long

**Chapter 4**

**Been Bleeding Too Long**

"Pick me up, been bleeding too long.Right here, right now, I'll stop it somehow.I will make it go away."

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Naruto's eyes fluttered open.He stretched and shifted closer to the warmth of his human pillow.-Human pillow?..-

The blonde sat up quickly, leaving his palm flat against his mate's chest."Gaara?.."

The other man didn't stir, but a light snore alerted Naruto that he was asleep.-Gaara's...asleep?!-

'Calm down, kit.Shakaku won't attack, he's content.He has a mate now.'Kyubi smirked.

Naruto groaned and put his face in his hands."What have I gotten myself into?.."

Gaara yawned and stretched languidly, body suddenly tensing when he felt the emptiness next to him.Naruto snickered and slunk off the bed.Shakaku's holder sat up and glanced at the empty bed in confusion.

"Naruto?.."Emerald eyes widened."Shit.NARUTO!"Gaara scrambled to get out of bed.

Naruto's blue eyes flashed from the end of the bed and his mate paused.Naruto grinned and pounced him, straddling his hips."G'morning."He purred.

The other man wouldn't meet his eyes, taking deep breaths.

"Gaara?"Naruto leaned closer in concern.

Gaara smiled shakily,"I thought you had left me.."He raised his eyes to Naruto's and wrapped him in a steel grip, pulling him down against his chest."Idiot, don't do that again."

The blonde felt a warmth fill him.This was different than when he was with Sasuke, his love was returned, he felt safe and warm with Gaara.With Sasuke everything had been cold...calculated...He had never told Naruto he loved him.Only one day with Gaara and he already felt like he could spend the rest of his life with him

'And you probably will.'Kyubi stated smugly.

-What do you mean?And stop listening to my thoughts!!-Naruto growled.

The fox yawned,'I can't help it when you're screaming them..'she continued before he could reply,'you and Gaara are connected.Not as strong as full demons would be, but your chakra is connected, therefore you'll be connected probably for the rest of your lives.And with Shakaku and I inside you and Gaara, you both could live a very long time.Your human emotions only strengthen the bond.'

-Thankyou Doctor Kyubi.-Naruto muttered sarcastically.

"What are you talking to her about?"Gaara questioned curiously, bringing Naruto back from his mental conversation with the fox.

"Uh..different things.."Naruto murmured against his lover's tan skin.

A deep rumbling startled Naruto, he almost sat up before he realized Gaara was purring.

"Shakaku's been talking to me to...about this.."His mate ran a calloused hand through Naruto's sunkissed spikes."Do you..are you ok with this?Do you ...really want me?"

"Gaara...I think I should be the one asking you that.."

Gaara snorted, causing Naruto to raised his head and stare into the emerald orbs,"Naruto, why wouldn't I want you?I...haven't known you for very long..but..I felt this connection..and now..I know why.I want you to stay with me forever.."

Naruto closed his eyes and sighed,"Forever is a long time Gaara.."

Gaara took this the wrong way and tensed,"Oh........"

"Nono!Gaara..I mean..You could find someone else...we could fight...anything could happen."

"Yeah.."Gaara got up."I have to go talk to my father.I'll be back later, do whatever you want but don't leave the house."

"Why?.."

Gaara didn't look at him as he opened the door,"Just please dont.."The door shut with a soft click behind Naruto's mate and the blonde was left in silence.

"That went well.."Naruto muttered to himself sarcastically and pulled the black sheets over his head.

'Why do you keep on pushing him away, then pulling him back in?Its getting annoying..'Kyubi grumbled.

Naruto flung his arms wide, "I dont KNOW.This is just..this whole ordeal has happened too fast.I guess Im still..dazed.."

'Well you'd better get your wits about you, Gaara may act like he has the patience of a Saint towards you, but its obviously hurting him.He feels like he's forced you into this, or I have.SHOW him, tell him you love him damnit, and try being seme!Uke is so boring..'

Naruto flushed to the roots of his hair,-Pervert fox!!-

The blonde turned onto his side and sighed, clenching his fist and pressing it to his forehead,"Im so stupid..he LOVES me..Why do I have to be so damned difficult?!"

He sat up quickly,"is that why he really left?Is he going to leave me?!"He threw the covers aside and looked down at himself, wincing slightly."Near-nakedness be damned!"He ran to the door and threw it open, nearly running into a small red-haired girl.

"Uh..uhm.."

"Who are you?"They asked as one.

The girl smiled shakily,"Im gawa's sister, Lilith."She tilted her head curiously, tangled short red hair shifting slightly as her sea green eyes stare up at him in innocence.

-That's amazing, someone from Gaara's family looking innocent..Now that I think of it..I haven't seen any of Gaara's other family members before this..he never talks about them.Who in the hell knew Gaara had a little sister?!-

Naruto grinned, squinting his eyes and kneeling,"Im Naruto, Gaara's friend.I was just looking for him-"

"Gawa's in daddy's room.."She wrinkled her nose, looking down at her tennis shoes,"I hope daddy isn't feewing mean today."Lilith looked up at him puppy dog eyes,"You'll protect him won't you, Naru?Gawa's...never bwought home a fwiend before..Brother needs more fwiends.."

Smiling down at the small girl, Naruto felt a pang of guilt in his heart,-I was being a bastard to Gaara all this time..and he's had it WORSE than I have..damnit...And his sister is skin and bones..she looks like she lives alone or something.-Memories of his days as a child alone brought memories to Naruto.He sighed down at the girl, causing her to look up at him in startlement.

"You awen't Gawa's fwiend?"

"Nono!I mean.Yes, I am his friend.trust me, I love Gaara more than you'll ever know."He touched her arm, softening his smile,"So where's your mommy, Lilith?"

"She..I don't have a mommy..Gawa and daddy are my family.And now youre part of my famiwy, wight?"

"Yeah, I can be your mommy."

Lilith giggled, eyes sparkling as she watched him look mock stern,"And how long has it been since you combed your hair, Lilith?..What's your middle name?"

The redhead blinked, rolling her eyes as she thought,"I dont think I have a middle name.Gaara and daddy just call me Lilith."

Naruto blinked rapidly,"You..your-"

Her eyes sparkled again,"I only talk like that to people I dont know.They think it makes me more cute and innocent."She flashed a grin similar to his.

"You're full of tricks.Just like me.When I was little I used to live all by myself.I didn't have a dad.And I didn't have a mommy like you.No one thought I was cute so to get recognized I would pull pranks on everyone."

"Will you teach me how to..pull pranks?"

"Eh?Don't you and your friends play tricks?"Naruto questioned.

Her expression fell,"none of the other kids like to play with me..Its because of daddy and Gaara..we scare them..Daddy says I have to be strong because one day the villagers will look up to me and I'll be the strongest ninja in the village."Lilith stuck out her chin,"I dont need friends!"

Naruto fell over laughing and Lilith giggled,"But I do like you Naruto.Are you going to stay with us?"

Naruto, still grinning, sat up and scratched his head,"Well..I plan to..but I guess its all up to Gaara..."

"Gaara will let you.He needs the company."Lilith stated firmly and stepped back."Come on, I'll show you where daddy's room is."

The blonde nodded and took the little girl's hand as she led him down the halls.

Lilith paused in front of a large wooden door,"This is daddy's room...I don't think you should go in, Naru.You should wait for Gaara out here."

"Why?"

"Daddy..wouldn't like you going in.I don't think he should know you're here.."She looked away.

Naruto frowned,"Does he..hurt you and Gaara?"

"What do you mean?"Lilith still refused to look at him.

"Nothing..I'll talk to you about it later.Let's work on making up a middle name for you, k' Lilly?"

The redhead noddedd enthusiastically and they sat down together a distance from the door, laughter and squeals drifting down the usually silent and stoic halls of the Sand Hokage's household.

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When I ran out of ideas...I MADE LILITH!Taa-daaaa..-cough-.

Dont know if she's going to be a constant character in the story..but I do like her.She's very interesting, to me at least.And Im amazed that my small incompetent brain came up with her.

If I remember right, Gaara's dad is the Hokage, and send his..maid..type..person to kill him.Gaara really hates his dad...His dad really hates Gaara..and in this story Gaara's dad is abusive and egotistic.-shifty eyes-.

There will be MUCH angst to come..if the story comes out as planned..

But dont worry..Naruto and Gaara won't breakup....YET!jkjk....MAYBE!BwAHAHHAHAHAHA..ahem..

Review please, ideas and suggestions are EXTREMELY welcome at this point;


	5. Are You Like Me?

**Chapter 5**

_**Are you like me?**_

"Are you like me..are you ugly..We are dead, we are alone."

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Gaara slipped inside the large wooden doors and cautiously glanced around, emerald eyes finally locking on the back of a large black chair.

"Father."

"Gaara.."The chair swiveled to face him and Gaara was greeted with the stern face of his father."Im assuming you know why I asked you to come to my office."His eyes narrowed.

Gaara's face remained expressionless and he nodded once, eyes never straying from his father's face.

"So, where is he?"

"I was distracted, I had to return."Gaara replied.

Frowning, his father stared at him then his lips slowly curved into a predatory grin,"you were being lazy.You disobeyed me, Gaara.You'll recieve your punishment, then continue your mission."

"Father..Orochimaru.."

"SHUTUP!"He roared, standing and digging his fingers into the desk in front of him,"I said NOT TO RETURN UNTIL YOU HAD CAPTURED THAT SNAKE!"

Eyeing him calmly, Gaara replied,"As I said father, more important business needed tending to."

"My son,"The man ground out,"Have I ever asked for you to use your own judgement?No, I have not.Your mission ALWAYS comes first.I hope you took care of this 'important business' because your leaving now.But first, on your knees."

"No."Gaara hissed."And if you come near me, dear father, I will not hesitate to slit your throat."

"Ah, you forget that I have your goard."

His son laughed, then smirked, revealing his fangs,"I don't need that stupid goard to kill you.Besides, my sand still obeys me whether I have the goard or not."Sand swirled around his outstretched fingertips and stretched in a bladelike shape towards his father."I will bring you Orochimaru, but on my own time.Don't ever threaghten me again.I have a reason now to cease this stupid 'agreement.'No more rape, no more abuse, and you can keep the fucking goard..If you need me, I'll be in my room."Gaara growled, sand slowly slinking back to him to wrap in a rope-like form around his arm as he walked from the room, father staring at his back with hate in his eyes.

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Gaara took a deep breath and shut the door behind him, leaning heavily back against it and digging his palms into his eyes.

He jumped when a voice called him back from his memories."Naruto?"His red head jerked up to stare at the other shinobi.

"What's wrong Gaara?"Lilith demanded in a commanding voice, hand on her small hips as she stared up at him.

Naruto stood a little ways behind him, looking at him with wide pleading eyes before he returned to staring at the ground.

-What's wrong with Naruto?..-"What are you doing here Lilith?"He put a tanned hand in his sisters short red hair.

"I found mom wandering in the halls and he was looking for you.So we waited for you."She eyed him carefully for injury, then glanced over her shoulder at the uncomfortable blonde before stepping aside so Gaara could take him in.

"Mom?"

His little sister giggled, eyes sparkling,"Naruto said he would be my mommy now.So does that mean Gaara is my new daddy?"She asked innocently, though her eyes were filled with mischief.

Gaara eyed her, eye twitching,"Lilith, you-"

"Gaara.."Naruto murmured.

Sighing, Gaara relaxed and slipped a hand into his pocket, staring at the downturned blonde head."Yes?"

Wincing at Gaara's emotionless tone, sky blue eyes rose to stare into emerald green,"I didn't mean it to sound that way.."When Gaara still didn't respond, Naruto bit his lip,"I would like to be with you forever..but you have a life here.Missions outside of Sand.I don't know if I can follow you..or vice versa."

"Where are you going?"Gaara questioned, narrowing his eyes.

"Gaara."The blonde twitched in agitation,"I'm not planning on going anywhere right now.If you want me to leave..I will.."Naruto clenched his fists and met his lover's slightly angry look squarely.

Shakaku's holder was the first to break eye contact, craning his neck slightly to look at the door behind them.He strode past Naruto,"let's take this somewhere else."

Lilith looked between them with wide eyes, then sniffed, looking at the ground,"love never does last, does it?.."She quickly raised her head, hoping for Naruto to deny it.

The blonde silently tilted his head to stare down at her, a solemn expression gracing his face before he slowly closed his eyes, turning to follow Gaara.

Lilith clasped her trembling hands in front of herself and allowed her unruly hair to slip over her face, ignoring the sun that was shining in her eyes from the open window."If love doesn't last, then is that why mommy died? I wonder if daddy stopped loving her..before she died..and..Gaara won't love me anymore..if love doesn't last..and neither will Naru."The small redhead blinked rapidly, trying to stop the prickling sensation in the corners of her eyes."Lilith isn't a monster..she is my friend..and Lilith loves me..so..it must last..Everything will be alright.."Lilith wrapped pale arms around herself and smiled, green eyes momentarily flashing orange."Naruto and Gaara with be alright."  
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Naruto shut the door behind himself and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back against it and staring at Gaara's back."This is pathetic."

"..."

"If you don't want me here, I'll leave."Naruto's eyes hardened(He is just like Sasuke, they can't forgive or forget, its just going to keep happening over and over again)."In fact, why don't I let myself out?Kyubi can find another mate just as soon as Shakaku.I don't need to listen to everything the demon inside me says, neither do you.Let's just pretend none of this ever happened."

"You are..truly ignorant..Naruto."Gaara whispered.

The blonde's shoulders tensed,"Don't call me ignorant."His eyes flashed red and he growled,"You!Do you know why I left Konoha??There's someone I love that I left behind!This same thing happened, we just don't get along.You're as cold and emotionless as that Sasuke bastard!"

Gaara turned, eyes wide.There was stunned silence between them for a few moments.

"Sasuke, eh?I was wondering why his scent was all over you."Gaara spat, eyeing him."You plan to crawl back to him don't you?Just forget me.."Gaara clenched his teeth, teeth now grown into fangs.

"Gaara..you don't understand.There were too many things that led up to me leaving Konoha to be explained right now.But you can be sure..Im not going back to Konoha..ever.Im not 'just going to forget about you.'Idiot.We've been together, what, a day?This is ridiculous!We sound like a fucking married couple!Which technically..we're susposed to be mates..but..Im starting to doubt that.There are others in surrounding villages who are demon holders.If you can claim you love me so quickly, and not mean it, maybe you should go and try to seduce one of them."Naruto glared.

Gaara fought to control the trembling and emotions,"just leave.Leave me."

The blonde opened his mouth, then made a dismissive sound before yanking open the door, stalking out and letting the aftermath of his surge of chakra shut the door.

His lover sank to his knees, staring down at his hands where the bloody bruises from his nails began to well and flow down his fingers to pool on the floor."Naru...to.."A tan hand covered the aching chest where his heart jumped and beat too quickly.A tear mixed with the blood on the floor, followed by another."I wanted you to love me..why can't..anyone love me.."Heart-wrenching sobs echoed through the room where a broken being shed his tears, no one to comfort him.

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-That was beyond stupid.-Kyubi hissed.

'You...don't interfere.I've had it with you, everything you tell me...you just keep on making it worse and worse.You're part of the problem.Just..go away..'Naruto quickly built wall upon wall in his mind to block out the Kyubi.He strode through the village, attracting many curious stares, and hostile glares.A few sand nins stopped in the street and gripped their leg pouches, ready to draw their kunai.

Naruto turned to them with black dilated pupils swimming in red, causing them to think twice.

'I don't need anyone.Never again.'

Soon he was walking across the dunes, using his chakra to partly dim the suns intense light and heat.Naruto didn't think about where he was going, because he no longer had anywhere to go.No destination, no purpose, no friends, no lovers..nothing and no one.

He remember what Haku said that one day on the bridge,'No..I had to believe it..its the hardest thing..to know you're not needed.'

"But I'm not as weak as you..Haku.I'm not going to let this break me.I'll keep clinging to life, even if its through bitterness and fear."Naruto smirked.

He had become all the people he had rejected.The old Sasuke and the old Gaara, combined to form a powerful being of hate and bloodlust.

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And I don't remember the song title or the lyrics I quoted above..it just popped into my head..and this chapter moved way too fast, Im sorry.Like I said, more angst.I got pissed at myself though..Gaara/naruto is my favourite pairing..and I just broke them up..dont worry..something will happen..


	6. Make Me Whole

A lone deer grazed leisurely on the grass in the chilly tundra like hill that slanted at an angle, located a ways up a mountain. A snow covered rock shifted slightly before a growl startled the deer.

It's head snapped up and she stare at the rock for a long moment before stepping closer, sniffing the ground curiously, tail sticking straight in the air as a warning that if she sensed anything wrong, she would run.

(You can just image Toshiro Musada's Naruto main theme playing right now. All the grunts and flutes.. -cough-) The silver haired being revealed itself, straightening to growl at the doe.

Seemingly entranced, the deer's brown eyes met slitted red and froze, unable to move a limb to flee.

"Stupid creature." Naruto rasped menacingly, baring his fangs.

A large orange fox, almost the size of a horse, shook its fur and straightened from where it had lain underneath the snow on a ledge above.

The deer shook with terror, letting out a low whine. Naruto snorted and ran a hand through his short silver hair, eyeing his prey."Well, aren't you going to get it?"

Two pairs of red eyes clashed in a battle of wills before Kyubi snorted in disgust and leapt, neatly standing over the deer and in a quick twist, snapping the helpless mammals neck. A sickening crunch echoed around the mountain before the sounds of wet chewing and torn flesh followed.

Naruto brushed the snow off of his long black sleeves that dragged along the ground as he crouched beside the Kyubi, watching emotionlessly as the deer was savagely devoured by the demon.

"Save some for me, baka."

'You were the one who was hungry in the first place, kit. You should have killed it yourself..weakling.'

Red eyes slowly faded to a dark blue, almost black and pupiless. The Kyubi's companion stretched his clawed fingers before he plunged them into the carcass, hand curling around the deer's heart before he ripped it out to bite off a chunk, chewing thoughtfully.

"Its almost winter,"He commented, stating the obvious.

'Its ALWAYS winter up here.'Kyubi growled, rolling her eyes before running a long red tongue along her bloodstained snout to clean it.

The silver-haired shinobi raised an eyebrow,"Yeah, but you ever notice how we get a shitload of snowstorms when its winter? And its just mildly cold in the summer and spring?"He blinked rapidly before turning to the fox,"Just how long have we been living up here?"

Kyubi tilted her head, ear twitching in the bitter air as she narrowed his eyes thoughfully.'Three..four years.'

"Time sure does pass quickly.."Naruto murmured with an air of regret before he took another chunk out of the heart.Blood splattered across his face as his fangs hit a vein. Wincing, Naruto wiped it off the side of his face and paused to grab a lock of bloodstained hair.

'You should have kept your blonde hair..' Kyubi rumbled, laying in the snow and crossing her paws before resting her massive head on them.

"Its better camoflauge..besides..why would I want fucking black hair?..ugly hair color.."Blue eyes narrowed at the memory of Sasuke's silken black locks. He chucked the heart to the ground in anger and stood, forcing a tight smile on his face as he stretched."How long has it been since we went down the mountain? Its cold up here, let's take a break."

The orange fox regarded him curiously before standing and shaking again,'have you gotten so lazy you need help getting down?'

A blur of black and silver was his only reply. Laughing as he ran down the sheer cliff of the mountain, using chakra to make sure he didn't fall, the sojourn spread his arms, allowing his black sleeves to flutter out behind him as the many layers hiding the lithe, lean body underneath billowed with them. The black outfit was almost like a kimono(think inuyasha, only much longer and wider sleeves that he uses like a pillow when he sleeps-shifty eyes-) with a white shirt underneath, and beneath that various layers of different patched shirts that helped keep out the cold. Naruto yelped with indignation as Kyubi grabbed him by the back of his shirt and leapt off the cliff, using chakra to slow the fall and increase the wind resistance as they plummeted towards the lush green treetops below.

With a loud thud they landed in dirt and grass, Kyubi immediately rolling in it.

Naruto, on the other hand, twitched, expression sour as he rubbed the back of his aching head. "What are you doing, idiot!"

'Grasssss'the fox demon exhaled before relaxing on her side, eyes closed in bliss as her nose twitched to take in all the scents.

"Stupid fox.." Naruto muttered affectionately before plopping down beside her. "So, where to?"

One red eye opened a slit,'what do you mean?'

"Well..we're not just gunna.." The silver-haired shinobi motioned vaguely."Wander. Where'll we go? What country?"

'Hmm..where there's no villages. Where there's lots of forest and warm weather. And grass..grasss...'

Blue eyes rolled skyward in exasperation before he relaxed back against the soft orange fur of the fox's belly."Maybe the Hidden Grass?"

A snort resounded in his mind,'and how long do you think before we run into those pompous beings that call themselves ninja?'

Naruto winced and shrugged,"it's better than going to Konoha.."

A dark ear lay flat against the soft orange head and a sigh made Naruto's body rock back and forth. He glanced curiously at his friend and blinked, expression hardening as he turned away.

In the years they had spent together, demon and demon holder had steadily grown closer. Killing, eating, sleeping, doing everything possible together. They were their only companions, their only friends. They only had eachother and Naruto was at ease, knowing his friend could not leave him because even though he had released a great amount of chakra and let her become a single entity again, he still had the seal, and that bound her to him. They would be 'stuck' with eachother forever. Kyubi had once told him, when asked, that the reason she was so adamant about destroying Konoha was that Konoha was her home. Smirking at the blonde's curious stare, she had explained that before the nins had decided to make a village there, it had been her territory, her forest.

"But..there's so much! Couldn't you just share?" The blonde had questioned accusingly.

'How much do you suppose, would a giant demon fox be willing to share with hundreds of tiny little humans that just made theirselves at home without considering about whatever else lived there! They didn't initiate the fight..no..Im proud to say that I was the first. All's they wanted to do was kill, kill whatever they feared or did not understand. Or whatever was more powerful than them. I couldn't let them change my home, make it their own and slowly drive me out. It was either fight or die.'

Naruto had been left to silently contemplate the Kyubi's admission.

Later, Naruto had changed his hair to silver with his chakra, using a seal to take away the color, and leave it snowy white. He didn't like it though, so he tinted it slightly, giving it a silver sheen. He had taken the clothes from random travelers that thought it a necessity to kill the rumoured 'hermit and his pet demon' that lived in the mountains. So far no ninjas had come, probably thinking the villagers were just spreading stupid stories and fairytales.

Kyubi and Naruto had made quick work of them all, and had ultimately benefited from the entertainment and supplies.

"Kyubi...do you think we'd get caught.."He said slowly, all the while hating himself.

She sat up slightly,"no."

He muttered angrily to himself, knowing that she had been putting on the whole angst act just to make him cave in.

'I'll put up chakra barriers, no one will even sense us. We'll keep in the most remote sections of the forest to prevent the anbu from running into us. And just to be safe..I'd cover your face. The whisker marks still show.'She replied cheerfully.

The silver-haired outcast sighed moodily and closed his eyes."Fine."

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DUN DUN DUNNNNn..

shifty eyes-

I got a review literally ordering me to update. lmao. So of course I have to update.

Here it is, another chapter to Help Me Breathe.Review with suggestions, please. Do you think Sasuke should catch him in the woods? Kakashi?..Iruka?..Your wish is my command.-sweatdrop-


	7. Behold A Tragedy

The silver-haired sojourn stretched and opened cobalt eyes, yawning tiredly before scratching his stomach.

'Nice to see you're awake. Plan on walking now?'

Naruto snorted and rolled off his companions back, easily taking up pace beside the massive demon."Not everyone has four legs."

The demon snorted, flicking her tail.

"Where are we exactly?"Naruto blinked, taking in their surroundings while he plucked at his sleeve.

Kyuubi hesitated before answering,'We're almost in Leaf territory.Should I change forms?'

"If we encounter someone, I can more than likely handle them.."

With a loud pop and a puff of orange coloured smoke, a small fox kit mewled and leapt into Naruto's arms, nuzzling his kimono before turning twice and falling asleep, tail covering nose.

"...Lazy bitch."

Kyuubi deemed not to reply and instead drifted into a much needed nap, leaving her bonded to navigate.

"I wonder if I'll see anyone I know. More than likely I will, they'll probably all be married and have children now...jobs..there'll be a new generation. Konomaharu might even be a chunin by now.."Thy man jerked uneasily at a twig snapping around a half a mile off.

"Someone's coming.."Naruto scratched his head and pondered the best choice. Either kill quickly and quietly, or play a friendly traveler from a secluded hidden village from Snow Country. It seemed fate made the choice for him when a kunai pressed threateningly to his windpipe, not uncomfortable, but not necassarily comforting either.

"Name, business, and origin. Don't try to lie, or I'll kill you."A deep voice rumbled, chest pressed against Naruto's shoulders.

"My name is Mimoko Nakatsu. Im a humble traveler from snow country come to Konoha to take a break from the cold."

A wry snort alerted him to a third presence from above. Naruto did not tense, knowing he could still win in a fight against the nins.

"How long do you plan on staying?"

"It depends. If the villagers are as welcoming as you, I'll probably leave within a day. If I like it here, maybe around a month or two."Naruto murmured with a easy smirk, Kyuubi stirring and pricking up her ears but still feigning sleep in the circle of his arms.

"What creature is that?"The voice lost some of its tension, replaced by curiosity.

"A snow fox."

"Why isn't it's fur white, then?"

"Because the climate changed as we came further from Snow Country, Snowball took on a coat for summer and spring."

"Ah.."The voice said uncertainly, obviously amazed at seeing such a creature. Naruto finally raised his eyes and blinked once, otherwise not showing his suprise.

Kiba, minus the fur jacket and with slightly longer and shaggier hair sat comfortably on a branch, arrogantly showing that he wasn't afraid of the foreign nin. He was decked out in jounin attire. Where was Akamaru?

A loud whistle echoed through the forest and a loud crashing came from their left. The nin behind him stepped back, kunai lowering but still remaining clenched in the man's fists. A massive red-brown wolfdog leapt into the clearing, tongue lolling out and ears flopping as he bound over to his master.

"Akamaru says there's no one else in the area."

Naruto raised an eyebrow, hand caressing Kyuubi's ear as her fur rose. Akamaru's ears perked up and he started forward, only to have Kiba grab his collar and hold him back."No boy, you can't eat it."

"Very well, we'll escort you to Konoha."

Naruto turned and eyed the other jounin, eyes bulging at Shino."..."

"Creepy-looking guy, isn't he?"Kiba cackled, yipping as a bee stung him.

Shino scowled and pushed the sunglasses up further onto his nose, eyeing the man once more with caution before nodding his head, an indication to continue walking.

"Man Shino..that was uncalled for."

"Shutup, mutt."

Naruto stiffled a grin, remembering the familiar banter that always took place between the two friends. It shouldn't suprise him that the two had become partners, and maybe more from the way Shino and smiling softly in fondness at Kiba's grumbling back as the other man leapt through the trees, dog following at a slower place near Shino.

Akamaru seemed taken by the bug boy, inching closer and closer as they walked till his furry back was resting underneath the boy's hands, deep brown eyes rolling back to gaze pleadingly at him. Shino grunted and absently began petting him, eyes locked on Naruto's back.

Ignoring the piercing gaze, the silver-haired nin took in his surroundings. There was no intense war happening from the looks of it, the trees and animals still abundant and everything was at peace. It didn't explain the extra security though, perhaps Tsunade had matured more.

The rest of the walk was done in silence, and when they reached the gate they were greeted by various chunin leaning against the open gate's entrance.

"He can pass."Kiba shouted, causing the chunins to wince in annoyance at the disturbance. One with a ponytail nodded, recording something on his clipboard.

"Pass then."

Naruto did a double take, staring at Iruka. The chunin's hair had grown out, the ponytail now reached the middle of his back and he had long silken strands of deep brown hair carressing his face and framing the pale skin. If anything, Iruka had only become more attractive as he matured.

Iruka's brown eyes locked with his, narrowing slightly as something sparked in the chocolate-colored pools."What was your name?"

"Mimino Nakatsu."

"..Are we related? Have we met?"

"I don't believe so. I'm from another country and am only visiting. This is my first time in this village."

The other man nodded slowly, forcefully lowering his eyes back to his clipboard and waving his hand.

Shino took his elbow and led him through the gates, Kiba strolling along on his other side."We'll find you temporary quarters so we know your location until our Hokage approves your presence in our village."

Naruto blinked, furrowing his brows,"Do you have a problem with our country?"

"No, it's only measures of protection for Hidden Leaf."Shino replied emotionlessly.

Villagers turned to watch the strange foreigner be escorted through the busy streets, the sight completely alien.

"You might want to get some new clothes."Kiba muttered, shaking his head as a teenage girl swooned.

"Is this unusual?"Naruto asked, feigning ignorance.

"Hai. Pants and a shirt are common here, only the village ninjas wear this gear, and it is required."Shino replied.

A pinkhaired woman stomped angrily across their path and into a flowershop, shoulders tensed.

Kiba whistled in suprise, stepping back with hands raised in obvious terror. Even Shino stepped back, bringing Naruto with him. Sakura cast them a poisonous glare before kicking open the door, jabbing a finger towards the counter where a clerk stood sweatdropping.

"Can I get you something miss?"

"Where's that bitch!"

"N-nani?"

"Where is the manager of this store?"

"Is there something you n-need?"The clerk whispered in terror, shrinking as the woman approached the counter. The curtain behind the counter was parted, revealing a beautiful blonde with layered shoulder-length hair and baby blue eyes. The girl brushed a lock of her from her eyes and smiled in amusement at the angered woman.

"Sakura, dearest, whatever is the matter?"

"You were supposed to meet me AN HOUR AGO!Ino PIG!This is the last time I schedule ANYTHING even remotely INVOLVING you!"

The blonde slung an arm around Sakura's shoulders and leaned in close to her ear, whispering lowly. A flush slowly rose to Sakura's cheeks, causing Naruto to raise his brows. Kiba slapped a hand to his forehead.

"Sorry about that, those two lovers always get into these arguments then make up a minute later.As Shikamaru would say, troublesome.."Shino snorted at that in amusement, finally stepping forward to continue their walking.

'Ino and Sakura!Together!Whhhhaaattt!I thought Sasuke and Sakura would have dozens of kids by now!'

"Here we are."Shino muttered, releasing his arm.

Naruto casually strolled to the desk, placing a few bills on the counter and taking room keys from the friendly manager.The tag connected to the key read room 21, which would be on the second floor. Sighing, Naruto dropped the keys on Kyuubi's sleeping side, jogging up the stairs and opening the door slowly, ignoring the grumbling from his fluffy companion.

Dropping back onto the bed, the silver-haired man could already begin to feel his eyelids sag with exhaustion."How long has it been since we slept on a bed?"

'Too long.'Kyuubi murmured appreciatively, stretching and reverting to her true form. Naruto groaned in annoyed and allowed the massive creature to rest her large paw against his chest, pulling him to her fur and rubbing her face happily in the soft pillows. Stretching into the warmth and comfort, Naruto let himself drift off to sleep.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

I have finally updated this story! I am shaming myself with these lame, short updates..-.-But I finally got the plot going again for this story. And I already have the next chapter completely planned out in my mind. So sorry for people who are waiting on Tired of Hating, I'll probably update this a few times before I focus on that again'

OHoh, and for the person who requested me to email the Gabriela Robin song to them, Im truly sorry, yahoo sucks ass and it took around an hour before I closed the window because it was taking so damned long to attach the song. So instead I'll give you the link to where I get a bunch of my pretty anime songs from, k? Its free and though they havent updated for a few months, they often post a lot of awesome, beautiful songs.

h t t p / a n i m e v i s i o n s . n e t / m p 3 . p h p (minus the spaces)

Another place that should be checked out that I found awesome was this forum that discusses songs that fit the naruto characters, some even include links for free downloading and I found a lot of the song-character matches really interesting.

h t t p / f o r u m s . a n i m e s u k i . c o m / a r c h i v e / i n d e x . p h p / t - 1 5 2 . h t m l (minus the spaces)

and other really great sites involving Naruto that have yaoi doujinshi scans and free stuff involving Naruto yaoi here are some more links

h t t p / f i g h t i n g - d r e a m e r s . o r g / (Many many free scanlations of Naruto yaoi doujins)

h t t p / b a k a . a m a z e . n e t

h t t p / f l e e t i n g f a n c i e s . n o k o r u , n e t / n a r u t o - f a n a r t - k a k a i r u - 2 . h t m l

h t t p / w w w . l i v e j o u r n a l . c o m / c o m m u n i t y / k a k a i r u

h t t p / k a k a i r u . d e v i a n t a r t . c o m

h t t p / w w w . l i v e j o u r n a l . c o m / co m m u n i t y / s a s u n a r u

and then if you go to my house on deviantart, all of my friends on deviantart are naruto yaoi artists, so you visit your houses and you are bombarded with yaoi of every pairing from Naruto

h t t p / L i s u l l e n l y e . d e v i a n t a r t . c o m

and if you really like writing and drawing, I would be happy to recieve messages or chat with you on

h t t p / w w w . e l f t o w n . c o m

You do have to make yourself a member but it only takes a few minutes and its free and easy and in the member search just type in copy and paste this

x.It Never Heals.x

And press search and it'll bring you to my house and there's pics and info on me and yeah..Im just trying to con you into visiting my house so I can babble to you about yaoi and anime and etc . I love talking to people who have the same interests as me though! Ohoh..and I also have a MSN messenger name and I would love to talk to you on that too, and I can send you loads and loads of good songs o-o I have hundreds of anime songs, and if I dont have them I can more likely get them and send them to you. So..yeah..this is it. end of a gery long thingy of author notes. Have funOo;


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